Givers and Takers

Are you a Giver?Or are you a Taker?
Maybe you do both.

I think back to when one of our teachers at the Yoga Studio where I teach had a birthday. I felt a little strange because I was the only one from our studio to go to her birthday party. I really feel strongly about supporting my friends.

Another time, yoga students of mine were graduating and moving out of town. They weren’t even coming to my classes anymore, but I still considered them friends. Again, I went to their going away party and didn’t know anyone else there. Fellow teachers and classmates didn’t show.

I get put in these situations a lot. I guess my problem is that I really care about people. I’m not waiting for the last minute for a better party to come along. I mark my calendar and commit. My loyalty runs deep.

There are times when I’ve given so much to people. And I don’t really expect anything back. But its nice when it happens. You really notice when people show you compassion. I have a friend in my studio who had major surgery. She remembered my kindness toward her and gave it back. It really meant a lot to me. Another friend dealt with cancer. I prayed for her and think about her often. And I keep thinking about her. I’ve had a heavy heart for a few weeks for a yoga student of mine who died recently due to a terminal illness. I remember her fondly and how she always supported me. She will be missed.

I have other fellow teachers who have experienced pains of a different sort. Maybe its a sort that I don’t know how to cope with yet. But when I figure out how to do it, I will. I just say sorry for now that I don’t know how.

I know of other times where I give a lot to people. But it is never reciprocated. And I just let it be. I now there are people like that in this world. They can’t change their character. Its just who they are. So I don’t expect much. In fact, my expectations are usually low. I love to be surprised by compassion, a share of joy, and even heartache.

Sometimes people ask for friendship. They want it, but they don’t want to give it back.

I’m painfully going to miss a student of mine who is leaving soon. This student has meant so much to me. The growth that I’ve seen both physically and mentally is amazing. Its only been a few years, but it inspires me to keep doing what I’m doing. I’ll miss this student just like I missed others. These friends are spread all over the world. Its good to know you have friends even so far away.

But I can’t change me. I want to put my heart out there. I’ve been super surprised when I hear that, upon leaving town or the studio, that what I did meant a lot to them. Maybe I didn’t hear it at the time. But it was later; after the fact. You never know what effect you’ll have on people unless you try. I love learning about my students and colleagues. They often never ask about you. But I still ask about them.

So keep on showing kindness. Keep on loving. Put your heart out there. Shine your light. Sometimes that light will get reflected back to you.

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