Weird Hair-old

So I’m growing less hair on the top of my head but I’m growing a lot more hair on my face. Why is that so?

I’m not a hairy guy, but it seems like my once-a-day shaves are not holding up as long. And if my facial hair is allowed to go 2 or more days, you can see prominent gray hairs in there.

I also have hairs growing out of places that I haven’t seen hair. Again, not a hairy guy. But I find hair on my shoulders and an odd hair on my chest will show up. And one stray hair on the top of my ear. Egad!!!

Weird things happen when you grow old.

I’m vowing a few things into my old age. If you see me, don’t allow me to…

…be a mouth breather. Don’t let me just stand there with my mouth wide open.
…slow my walk to a snail’s pace. Zap me with a cattle prod if I slow down.
…not be aware of my surroundings. Let me keep a 360 degree watch of where I am.
…display my dinner on my face. Somebody please clean me up.
…not be able to get out of my chair. If it takes me 5 seconds to get up, make me do 5 squats.
…have nose hairs that you can mop a kitchen counter with.
…dress like an old person. No, I don’t want to look like I’m going to a Rave. But please!
…treat service staff, servers and such, with a gruff selfishness. Please make me be kind.
…drive 10 mph under the speed limit. Honk if I’m forgetting to live my life in earnest.

[repost this and tag me every 5 years; ummm make that every 3 years]

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